Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Hopin' and Wishin'

I'm playing Beyonce to my dogs in the hope they will make up a dance routine.

OMG

When I was 23/24 I was a SUCH a pretentious douche! hahha!


I'm impressed.

Oh And..

I'm marrying Tom now, ALL CHANGE!


New groom, he is looking fresh to death.


Hubba hubba.


This is so modern, updating grooms via a blog. And a tad crass, well they don't call me Tacky Lil for nowt*.










*I literally have never been called this.



The More You Ignore Me The Closer I get

I get married in 39 frigging days!


Happy Valentines Ya'll!

Friday, 20 May 2011

I'm back.

I don't understand other blog sites so im back baby.

So much has changed in recent times. I will update in a dramatic fashion soon.

Tuesday, 16 November 2010

I Can't Get No Sleep

Been a while ey?
So things change, for the better or for worse, but ultimately they always will change. Things that have not changed though is that fact that I am still as......interesting as before and will strive to become more things than just a bit o' cheap entertainment.
Updates will be more frequent. I know my fans need me.

Sunday, 17 October 2010

Who keeps asking me weird questions?

Who keeps asking me weird questions?

Answer here

Any crushes from your time up north?

LOL Yes.

Ask me anything

When will you admit katy Perry is your love child?

I don't think I will ever admit that. Not until I see some dollar bills ya'll

Ask me anything

as soon as your born they make you feel small

Is this a question? I g

Ask me anything

Monday, 1 February 2010

Thats What Friends Are Foooooooooooooorrrrr

I miss my best friend a lot. She never ceases to make me happy and say the right thing and just generally be a good friend.

It was so good seeing her at the weekend and making secret plans. MWAH HA HA HA HA HA.

Thursday, 12 November 2009

Thursday, 8 October 2009

Monday, 5 October 2009

Thursday, 1 October 2009

Did I Ever Told You I Have A Favourite Poem?

I always worry that I don't like enough things, like I've said before I don't have a favourite flower or food or colour or anything, I think I'm like...I don't know. But it worries me. HOWEVER I was just talking to my emo little sister and I had a vision...of myself at that age, and I used to write this poem out on things, on my Livejournal (yes, its still there), send it to boys from anon and generally be a complete faggit about it.

Anyway, should I die/become rich & famous and never talk to you/run away then you will know that I DID have a favourite something.

Enjoy!

I DO NOT LOVE THEE

by: Caroline Elizabeth Sarah Norton (1808-1876)


I DO not love thee!---no! I do not love thee!
And yet when thou art absent I am sad;
And envy even the bright blue sky above thee,
Whose quiet stars may see thee and be glad.

I do not love thee!---yet, I know not why,
Whate'er thou dost seems still well done, to me:
And often in my solitude I sigh
That those I do love are not more like thee!

I do not love thee!---yet, when thou art gone,
I hate the sound (though those who speak be dear)
Which breaks the lingering echo of the tone
Thy voice of music leaves upon my ear.

I do not love thee!---yet thy speaking eyes,
With their deep, bright, and most expressive blue,
Between me and the midnight heaven arise,
Oftener than any eyes I ever knew.

I know I do not love thee! yet, alas!
Others will scarcely trust my candid heart;
And oft I catch them smiling as they pass,
Because they see me gazing where thou art.

Horse and Carriage

I want this as my wedding dress.



Can we PLEASE get married soon Bertie?

Friday, 18 September 2009

Leaving On A Jet Plane

We move on Wednesday to the Wellington Hotel in Bradford.

oooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Quote of the day

"I can't be arsed to go to art group" - Kathleen Louise Farrell

Ha ha. Ma is such a bad ass.

Friday, 4 September 2009

Love Love Love Love Love Love....I hate you

Ohgodistillhateeveryone.
I feel my tolerance of people is lessening, which is pretty bad seeing as i didn't really like anyone before hand anyway. Martin and I decided to put together a burn book, you know like on mean girls where you write horrible things about people who pizz you off, but I grew weary of trying to think of specific things cos as you know, a lot of my beef is in my head thus irrelevant to the real world. However, that said....ha ha.
I hate how some people are just so so so so obnoxious, not how I am, but in a way that is suffocating, sometimes I don't even think they know they are doing it, it literally makes me want to be violent.
There is this girl, lets call her "Chinese Pig" it makes sense BELIEVE! Anyway, Chinese Pig infuriates me, she does this dumbed down idiot thing for attention or whatever coupled with incessant moaning and talking about herself, to me and certain other individuals in my clique it is absolutely abhorant, however to the rest of the bleeding world it is this endearing quality that makes her get the attention she is so desperately craving........WHY? What the frig? So then I look like the knob for sneering and doing my usual of sitting drinking looking disgusted with the world. Girls like that will always win, they're not the prettiest, defo not the cleverest, however one thing they have mastered is MANIPULATION. It makes me sick, and jealous ha ha.
That is my biggest gripe of the day.
I will update with further gripes at a later date.

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

Crazy




LOVE IT. I want to go back to 94. Life was good then.

Thursday, 13 August 2009

Oh I See


I'm 25.
Its official. I'm grown up.
SUCKS!

Wednesday, 5 August 2009

Happy Anniversary

One year together. Feels like longer, in a good way.
I love my boy.
Happy Anniversary to us.
Add Image

Thursday, 25 June 2009

Michael Jackson


'He lived a fabulously self indulgent life' - quote about Michael Jackson.

I only listened to him today...they don't really care about us. How right you were dear Michael.

I am deeply saddened by the death of old MJ, as my Aunt just said via text 'First Luther, now him' it would seem all the old greats are dying a 1000 deaths.

Bit morbid, but now i'm thinking about people who might die soon, or just like off the cuff.

Spud. Stay safe.

Where were you when Michael died? I was sitting at the pooty listening to Black star by Radiohead sending emo texts to my sister.

God bless 'im, and all 'ho sailed in 'im.

Wednesday, 10 June 2009

Saturday, 30 May 2009

Geek Party

In the wee hours of the morning we got invited to a 'party' after we closed the pub, which almost flipping killed me as we had 3 bands on and I was uber TIRED. Anyway upon arrival there was 2 geeks, an xbox and Sol beer.

*siiiiiigh* I should have known better really. Robert had a good time at least.

The lesson here is once a geek always a geek, and that generally means they are BORING.

Monday, 18 May 2009

Hello Darling

HI
I haven't updated for ages cos i'm USELESS!
Up north is going well. They speak right proper funny, ey up.
I can't think of anything hilarious to write at present as i'm hung over and VERY tired.
BAH HA http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/advertisement_feature/oasis_rubberduckzilla/article2416846.ece

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

THAT'S IT


As soon as I marry Bert i'm going to divorce him he said Robert Pattinson wouldn't go out with me.

I disagree. He's a grubby, highly attractive young thing, much like me.

Monday, 30 March 2009

Getting To Know Your Favourite/Prettiest Blogger

Do you prefer crushed ice or cubed? Cubed, its easier to spit out.

What print is on your plates or cups in your kitchen? Cats in dresses.

Have you ever made a mixed cd for someone? ohemgee. Yes, BB (remember him Hooty) he made me one too! Ahh I was quite sweet really.

What word/phrase do you find really annoying? I'm not being funny yeah. You blates are gonna be funny. yeah.

Do you find yourself not having enough electrical outlets? Oh all the time. Its such a bind. Drives me loco.

What is the longest you can wait patiently? About 30 seconds.

Friday, 27 March 2009

Boy Boy :(

I'm leaving tomorrow. To the NORTH.
It makes me so, so sad to go. I'm going to miss my beloved homeboys so much. It makes me feel a bit sick, you know when you're stomach like actually churns.
Oy vay.
It's going to be real hard :(
Please stay in contact.
Ya'll have my number.
Email me up mysweetheartthedrunk@hotmail.co.uk

Puppy Love



Now, I know when I said about this SOMEONE (Name) got offended, but if Jack was a puppy he'd be this one. He does smile like this, Name has countless videos of him doing it.

Look! Can you see it?

Aaaw Jacky.

Thursday, 19 March 2009

I Shall Hence Forth Be Known As MRS Rachel Cullen

I <3 him.

Book

Can someone help me? I'm looking for a book I read.....about 18 years ago.

Its about this Dinosaur, a girl one, she's purple, and she's a bit crazy and she's trying to hatch an egg. Basically the story is she hatches the egg in the end.

I loved it so much.

I can't find it no where.

Wednesday, 18 March 2009

WOWA


These two rejects are still together.
They're so fugly.
Eew.
She has a giiiiiiiiant chin.

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

Blazing Glories


Sponsor my sisters, and their friends.

They are doing the Race For Life.

CLICK HERE to Sponsor them.

Please do it, or I'll set my dog on you.

Shes Baaaaaaaaack


She doesnt look too bad actually.

Aaaw

Apart from the fact I look like the living dead, this is a real nice picture of me and my fellow blogger, and sister, Alice.


Aaaw.

Friday, 13 March 2009

Getting To Know Your Favourite/Prettiest Blogger

Do you believe in lots of conspiracies? No, I was raised by a crazy mother who thought stuff about various national leaders that may or may not have been true.

Are you good at baking? Hell yes. I make good stuff.

Have you ever made your own clothing? No, i've jiggery pokered things around, but i'm no good at that kind of whackness.

Do you have anything you keep on you 24/7? My skin and hair.

Do you usually write in print or in cursive? Ummmmmmmmm......I don't know.

What was your first job? Organ grinder.

Thursday, 12 March 2009

Work

Is the gayest thing in the world.
Its driving me mad.
I'm really going to miss it though.
Boo hoo.

Wednesday, 11 March 2009

Tuesday, 10 March 2009

It All Ends Today......

YES IT ALL ENDS TODAY.

Somehow my memory stick ended up in the washing machine....it had pictures from day the day the babies were born to present day...and no I don't have a back up.

Nat thinks she knows of a way to retrieve the information but i'm too melancholy to think positively.

I can't liiiiiiiiiive if living is without youuuuuuu, I can't liiiiiive, I can't take anymooooooore.

Goodbye dear friend.

Ah my dear Friend Lou. Harold said that once.

KILL ME!

Sunday, 8 March 2009

The Last Supper








HA HA!
Also found out HILARIOUS UNFORTUNATE NEWS!
Love it.


Friday, 6 March 2009

I Can't Wait To Leave This Hell Hole

My FINAL business review.
I hate it so much.
It fills me with rage.

Wednesday, 4 March 2009

More Mozza







Trust Rob to put my bandana on the dog! ha ha.
How cute is he?
Aaaw. Love it.



Twitter

Join.
Blame Amo, she got me into it.
I only have weirdos following me.
Gaaaaaaaaay.
Search RuddyHell.

I Gooo Back To Blaaaack

I couldnt stand the hassle of being a red head. Its hard work, and we all know i'm laaaaaazy. Lazy baby.
Poser aint I. Ah well, I have no make up on so I lose really.

Getting To Know Your Favourite/Prettiest Blogger

What is the best halloween costume you have ever worn? I went as Stuart Little to a friends house party once, it was hilarious. I ended up with someone dressed as Desperate Dan on the dancefloor. Best night EVER!

What kind of soap do you use? I prefer not to. I prefer my natural odour of Vodkat and pringles....who am I kidding, its Tangy Toms.

How many icons do you have on your dekstop? Probably more than I require. I refuse to count cos that'd involve using my mouse, and I resent it.

What is the biggest amount of money you have ever had at one time? About £3000. No I don't know really, probably less then that. I've never been one for being rich.

Do you understand how telephones work? Yes to a point. I don't want to explain it thou, not cos I can't, I just don't wanna.

Do you write notes on your body? Yes, my anus. Generally my left hand.

What is the prominent color in your closet? BLACK!

What is sitting next to you right now? No one and nothing. I'm always alone.

Oh Sweet Puppy

He comes to the pub tomorrow :)

I'm so excited.

His name is SACRE BLEU!!!

I'm in love. Aaaw.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

Nat and I have been together 3 years.

Time sure flies when you're having fun.

Happy Anniversary Wifey!!!

Tuesday, 3 March 2009

Morrissey



AAAAAAWWWWWWW. My dog. And my boots, at the back. I miss those bad boys. They make the sound of grown up shoes.

Well, he's probs gonna be Berts one cos I want the puppy all to myself.

My OTHER New Dog

I'll post a picture of Morrissey later, however we are getting ANOTHER dog. Berts friend (some whore) has this Sharpay dog and its had like 8 puppies so he is giving us one, I'm going to call is Emo or Vedder. I havent decided yet. Or maybe Chubby Mc Wrinkleson.

LOOKThat's not the EXACT one i'm getting, but it'll look sommink like that.

LOVE IT.

Ohhh.....just found out its probs a girl. What the frick am I meant to call it now!!!

Bad News Name and Alice

Jared is going out with Tasha from Home and Away.
ha ha. Her Home and Away husband (I forget his name) is now on Power Rangers.
Oh....how I laughed.

Monday, 2 March 2009

AGAHHHHHH

AHHHH!

She is SOOO ugly. It actually annoys me how fugs she is.
She could make herself look better, I don't know how but she has the money. She has the power! Please woman, if not for me, then for the children, they deserve better than this. Come on, seriously.

Apparently she is getting back with her jackass husband. YEEEEES. I've been surviving on Lindsay Lohan (I never knew she'd done anything other than Parent Trap) and Samantha Ronson (its cruel how ugly she is, have mercy on her) and thats only cos Amy left Blake and Britney got saved by her Dada, so I've had to lower my standards.

I want some proper good crackheads to entertain me, not British people though, or Americans, some people from Neighbours going off the rails would be good.

Talking of Neighbours, ohemgee, please let Harold accept the treatment for his cancer, I CRIED when I watched that, it was when he was all like to Karl 'you CANNOT tell anyone, you have your OATH' and Karl was all like, bereft and he was like spend what you want on the wedding (to Lib) cos he was all like 'life is too short'...oh and WHAT THE HELL?!?!? Who is this new Libby? She doesn't even look like the old one, apart from having dark hair! Dan is too hot for her, he was hotter then old Libby, but at least it was the REAL Libby. However, one good thing is that Susan is going to be Mrs Kennedy again.

Life is so hard sometimes.

Weird

You know when you have a 'debate' and you are like really getting annoyed only to realise that you are both arguing the same point...well Hannah and I had one of those moments.

Weird. People sometimes spell it Wierd. That's wrong.

I am right, unfortunately so is Hannah, but I am MORE right.

I'm just saying.

Sunday, 1 March 2009

Kids!

Ave said that she was going to eat Mummies make up.


She wasn't joking. Ha ha. I almost wet myself.

Boys









Too cool for school and twice as cute.
I Love Jack Jack and Oboe

Saturday, 28 February 2009

Getting To Know Your Favourite/Prettiest Blogger

Do you look at yourself when you pass by reflective surfaces? I never used to but now I do A LOT. But I guess like a fine wine I am getting better with age so it makes sense.

Would you ever get plastic surgery? Hell yeah, and not just for me either, for all the ugly bitches I know too.

Did you play with shaving cream when you were a kid? Yes! Of course.

How big is your bed? Big enough. Perv.

Do you like the smell of axe? Is this a rude question? I don't want to answer, its like at school when people would be like 'are you a virgin?' and I didnt know what it meant and I'd be like yes and they'd laugh and if i said no they'd be horrible. I'm not falling for that again. No sirree.

What is your favorite flavor of lifesavers? Lemonjello.

Have you ever seen a volcano? Yes, its called Hootys temper/tolerance levels. Oooh I went there.

Friday, 27 February 2009

I Have A Confession To Make

You know when people are like 'send my love' and 'tell them I said hi' or some whimsical tale to pass on when they know you're seeing someone......I never do it, nor do I intend to start.

Don't be so lazy! Do it your frigging self.

I feel better now, I've kept that a secret for YEARS!

We Need To Talk...

AGAIN. Tom...can you explain this.....


Yes you look nice with a bit o' muscle but I can tell you're going to be bad in this film.
Did you also know that Bronson is Wakefield prison? Yes Tom, I expect you did, so unsubtle.
You disappoint me. You really do.

Ode To....

Me! Ha. Submitted by my dear Bruv, Anders Ward.

An ode to Bruv:

Oh how I’ll miss my little bruv,
The only TO I’ll ever love.
The little office down the hall,
Put George Michael on we’ll have a ball.
Here comes hoppity what a fool,
Mind you here comes telly,
What a tool!
We were so good at taking the pi$$
Oh Bruv come back your already missed!


Aaaw. I love you Andrew. Like a sister.

I'll Stick With You Baby For A 1000 Years.....Goooooooolden Years












Sam. I love you. Like I love......other hot people.

Dentist

I LOATHE you.
He almost killed* me. I honestly thought i was having a fit or something.
GAH now my mouth tasted really funky, its making me shudder. And my tooth is all scritchy.
I hate him even though previously I thought he was handsome.


*he injected me with poison.

Praise Indeed

'Actually, thats better than I expected.'

FINALLY! A bit of recognition from the man who thinks he is god.

ha ha.

Kiss it.

Wednesday, 25 February 2009

Happy Birthday

To my blog.
One beautiful year together.
Thanks for the memories baby.

Loves It


Berties Getting His Face Pierced For ME

Half a snake bite so far.

he's a good boy.

Midnight Sun


I thought Adam was making it up, he often says things that I don't believe. However, on this occasion he was telling the truth.

Midnight Sun is Twilight but from the mind of Edward, not Bella.

The real life Bella is starting to annoy me.

My obsession with Edward is only getting worse. I've started talking to my poster, he's a foul mouthed minx. Oh Eddy boy!

I Still <3 You


Tuesday, 24 February 2009

Getting To Know Your Favourite/Prettiest Blogger

Has anyone ever accused you of being gay? Yes. Grace and Name. Even though I'm the only one who HASNT kissed a girl. Let alone kissed a girl and liked it.

Can you tell people honest things to their face? I'd really rather not.

Would you rather eat grits or oatmeal? Grits. Come on you knew I'd say the weird answer.

Do you own a kite? I owned the worlds tiniest kite, I bought it off some poor dude or charity dude or whatever. But I gave it to Hoppy cos I had neither the time nor the inclination for such things.

Have you ever run down and up escalator or vice versa? Accidentally. I think I was in year ten and I was out with Hannah and her little friend and I accidentally went on the stairs and they were going to the shop, it was a sad moment as I was such an incredibly awkward teenager. It really was a sight to behold. I can't say behold without wanting to sing Rocky Horror....I am just seven hours old, truly beautiful to behold, but somebody should be told, my libido hasn't been controoooollled.

What do you think of clothing for pets? LOVE IT! Love it. I think it should be compulsory! Spesh neckercheifs.

Mohawk Boy, Oh Mohawk Boy

Oh man. Why must he always come and talk to me when I look like a swamp donkey.
WHY?
I love him too.

I Miss Them


Crazy mofos.
They've gone off me, I can tell. Well Adam has, he's a bitch like that.
I want them to move back to the motherland and hang and crap with us.
Gay.
I can't even eat rolos to cheer myself up.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

When I was a kid I loved Rolos, but I went over kill on them. Recently we rekindled our romance, but as usual i've gone and ruined it, they taste like icing sugar.

GREAT!

Everything sucks so bad.

Oh Balls

eeew.
I got busted posting this.
ha ha.